What Happens when you Grow a Beard?

August, 2022. My in-laws'
dog in the background.

Parents do things for their children. It's part of the job description. Sometimes, we do things and we don't even understand why we're doing it for them. Sometimes, our children ask us to do something that seems simple enough when we start out.

A Halloween Tradition

We have a tradition in our family that centers around Halloween. It's been happening for a few years. Every Halloween my children decide what I'm going to be. I don't go trick-or-treating with them. I hold down the fort at home and keep a little campfire going for the nice children and parents that come by for their annual candy. I usually have a pot of apple cider warming on the fire for the nice people who come by.

There is one constant element to the costume my children pick out. I have to have a beard. Beginning October 1, I give the shaving cream, razor and aftershave a month-long vacation and let nature take it's course. My children's costume choices have been lumberjack, lawn gnome, and Santa Claus. The year I was Santa Claus was a year I didn't have to grow a beard. Santa's beard is white and I, with my youthful vigor, sport a dark brown beard that may or may not have some spots of gray.

It's August, but...

At this point, Halloween is three months away, but it has been a year since I started preparing for it. I stopped shaving one year ago in preparation for the one night of the year kids are encouraged to get candy from strangers. My children have decided that I need to be Hagrid for this coming Halloween. The idea was originally thought up by The Oppressed, who is a rabid Harry Potter fan. She was able to convince The Boy of this idea. I don't know how much candy was promised in exchange for this.

Of course, it's always easier to just go to the local costume shop and buy a beard, but that would take the fun out of it. Just ask my children, who were very happy to see I was getting ready for Halloween 14 months in advance. The upside to this was that I was starting this journey as Summer was winding down. July days can get pretty hot.

My children wanted to see how long of a beard I could grow, which is why I got started on this journey one year ago. As the year went along, the children wanted to check on my progress. This was easy to do. All they had to do was look at me. There were times when I told them there was plenty of time until Halloween, and it wouldn't hurt if I just gave myself a little shave. My beard would be back in all of its lustrous glory. My children informed me that would not be possible. We had already started our journey and it was too late for me to shave now. That would have to wait until after Halloween.

September, 2022

The Beard is Getting Grubby

November, 2022

School started and so did the itchy rash that occurs as the beard goes from grubby to fully grown in. My beard came in handy as the weather turned cooler and then colder. There was also the maintenance that went along with a beard that grows and grows. I needed to give it the occasional comb so my beard wouldn't tangle or frizz. Styling cream helped keep the mustache out of my mouth. I trimmed it a couple of times, but as Halloween is drawing closer, I've let the mustache grow for that authentic "Hagrid" look like any decent half-giant.

Father's Day gave the family a chance to help me care for my beard. I received styling cream, balm, and beard oil. The cream helped me hold the mustache. The oil helped to keep my beard healthy and beautiful. I've trimmed the beard on occasion to prevent it from looking to wild and crazy. I'm not sure if Hagrid would approve, but I can't find him so I can't ask.

People Like the Beard

Family, friends and neighbors all comment on the beard. Even some strangers have offered their two cents as we pass by each other. Most of it has been compliments on how long it has grown. Some ask how long it took. Others ask questions about how it feels in the Summer. It doesn't feel too bad or uncomfortable, although My chin wonders how the rest of my face feels when there's a breeze on a hot day.

My children are excited for Halloween to arrive. They tell everyone they see that I look like Hagrid. I think it's more like Rasputin or John Brown, but whatever. I'll have my campfire on the driveway in October and distribute candy to the little muggles who may be in awe that someone created by J.K. Rowling somehow jumped out of the pages into the Muggles' world. On the next day, I can head down to the local barber shop where I pamper myself with a shave and a haircut and, as I like to say, let my face breathe. Unless, of course...

What I think I look like. (Photos: Wikipedia)

There is a local store that has a Christmas Village. I worked there a couple years ago. I told my children I was an "elf". When they heard this, they informed me I was not allowed to shave my beard and had to keep it until the Christmas Village shut down. If I go back there, I may not be allowed to shave my beard until the new year.

Today

"A Collection of Short Stories" by Greg Gorman is available for purchase on Amazon or Apple Books.