Mourning and Loss in the Family

It hasn't been the best of months for my family. In just a few weeks, we have said goodbye to two members of our clan. On of these relatives was an older person, the other wasn't so old, and that made it harder to say goodbye.

"C" was young and healthy. It was a shock when we learned they were diagnosed with cancer. It was a difficult journey for her and her immediate family. My own family did all we could to for them and their family. The doctors did all they could do, but, unfortunately, it wasn't enough. We all gathered to say goodbye to them. It was comforting to see the long line of people who waited to say goodbye to them and offer condolences. I was amazed at the number of people who had been touched by "C" during their short life.

It obviously wasn't easy for their family. "C" had passed close to Easter. There is never a good time to say good bye to a loved one, but doing it close to a holiday makes it especially difficult. Life goes on, but that doesn't mean it's easy.

The illness added a new angle of responsibilities for their family. Relatives stepped up and helped how they could. Taking care of a loved one doesn't mean other responsibilities can be left by the wayside. It means taking on the challenge of time management and prioritizing. There are additional errands, more places to go, more appointments.

Another Loss in the Family

Not long after, we had another loss in the family. "J" had also been ill for a while. They were older, and had a chance to live their life. As usual, there was an illness and doctors did what they could do for them, but in the end, it wasn't enough. "J", as my father-in-law likes to say, went to their eternal reward.

Losing a loved one is hard. As I said before, if an older person dies, it's still sad but you can take comfort in knowing they had lived their life. When a family gathers to remember someone who passes, there are usually some stories being swapped about past accomplishments or a happy memory one has of the departed.

We had done just that. when a relative died, the family came together and talked. We shared stories about what the deceased enjoyed doing. What made them happy, and how they made us happy. People were thinking about "J" and hoping he would recover so he could go back to living his life and doing what made him happy.

And then there was J's spouse. They were doing all they could getting to doctor's appointments and holding things together at home. Not an easy task.

The Children

"I still held out hope for a miracle, no matter how unlikely."

"C" left young children. Like the rest of the family, I have been thinking about them. I can't imagine being a child and losing a parent. They will be growing up fast. That's not something anyone envies. Of course, there is still another parent in the house who will help them when they have a problem, but you can bet they will be thinking of their lost parent.

"J" did not have any children, but that didn't mean they didn't leave a family. While they were fighting their battle, we got updates on progress being made. Family sent well-wishes. We all hoped for the best. When news came that one of the illnesses was terminal, I still held out hope for a miracle, no matter how unlikely.

It's Always Interesting

There is a level of excitement and activity. I don't mean "excitement" in a fun way.

The month of April has been an interesting one for my family. I usually tell people, "It's a long story, but it's a really good one." Every family has their exciting periods. There is a time when there is no rest for the weary, time when one thing after another arises and all you can do is roll out of bed and face what lays before you. Our family has mourned "C" and "J". I still continue to think of their immediate families and hope that everyone does well in moving on and living their lives.

In my own family, we have done our share of taking on challenges and facing life. More often than not, there is a level of excitement and activity. I don't mean "Excitement" in a good, fun way, I mean it in a way that commands our attention and dictates our schedules. It's an element of life that keeps us on our toes and usually has us sitting down at the end of the day taking a breath and wondering when the other shoe is going to drop. Honestly, sometimes I could use a little boredom.

You always try to help people as best you can. I am constantly thinking about the families of "C" and "J". I hope they are holding up as well as they can. If a need arises, I will be sure to help them, however they need that help. Life will go on. The kids will get older. There will be new experiences for them to have. Their parent won't be there with them, but they will never be forgotten.



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